Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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