He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
