i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
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Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
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Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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