If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize
