and i looked up. we had an audience...
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
