Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize