UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
