So drunk its hurt
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I think my moral compass just broke
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize