I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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