I skipped work to stalk him.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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