Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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