My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
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i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
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i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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