That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Vodka?
Forever.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
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