5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
