it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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