lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.