Where did you get a picture of my penis
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
