TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
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