Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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