plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
well you can't waste a boner
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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