Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Drunk is not a location!
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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