something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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