Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
This gyro tastes like lonliness
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
