Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
