Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
