He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
