can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
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