sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
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