This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
