It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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