Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
this beer tastes like vomit already
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
