Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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