I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
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