im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
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you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
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Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
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