im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
