I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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