belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I'm sobbing to NWA
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
