Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize