that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Randomize
