I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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