so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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