The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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