You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
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I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The power of my boobs compel you
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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