Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize