You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
We are all done wearing pants today
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
I did not marry a roomba.
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