It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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