I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
