youre lurking in front of me
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Welp...herpes.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
