The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Randomize
