Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
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all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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