sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
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Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
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The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
is it fun? or sober?
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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